There are times where believing in God…

and following His call in your life will absolutely “wreck” your life…

I read that the daughter of @maryhurlbut has started on a missions trip to Romania, which if you know or don’t know your recent history, it’s not a good one; former state within the Soviet Union, Nicolae CeauลŸescu, orphans and state run orphanages… and a few other things, but utterly heartbreaking to the core.
Some of my friends this past weekend announced they are going to moving to Thailand soon to work with those who are exploited and trafficked by way of the sex industry. They learned about it a while ago and they decided that is what they feel called to do, learning about it coupled with God laying it on their heart has “wrecked” them.

Being wrecked doesn’t have to imply that it’s a bad thing, it gives the individual to be built back up with new and better parts, but it requires giving God all the present parts which indeed can be the painful aspect of being rebuilt. Dietrich Bonhoeffer put it terms of dying; that by dying to self allows God to come in and live and through him living for better, living not for self but for others.

***

There are times where I feel like I’m in a waiting-to-takeoff position on the runway of life. I know what it takes to “fly” and I will in time, but right now there are things preventing me at this time. Which is why I spend a good deal of my time looking for a job, because that is a priority to getting me away from here to there…IL to SoCal to be specific! Yet while I find myself in a holding pattern, it doesn’t keep me from living out my calling with high school students, with the poor in my community with the LGBT/PFLAG groups I’m involved with, it keeps me in tune with what I’m called to do and be a part of in the larger, out-of-IL, picture.
In many a way my life is “wrecked” by God because I recognize how little time I have. No I don’t know the days and years, but I do recognize that if I live to be 81 years old, I have already used (for better or worse) up 1/3rd of my life… I can either perceive that information as scary or motivating to do more with my life, to do what I can to make a difference.
I doubt I will be remembered by way of making a name for myself, but I do recognize I have a chance at making a difference in the lives of others that have ripple effects spreading out to generation and generation, including my own! This is what I strive for, this is how I allow God to “wreck” my life be ruined on a regular basis.

~Nathanael~

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