I am torn between grief and rage

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Last week at the small group I attend I found out from a guy who serves at the soup kitchen I used to that one of the regulars was murdered. He was shot down in cold blood.
This guy was no stranger to me, for he was a regular. He was hearing impaired, and so we’d communicate by writing notes to each other. As we got to know each other better, I found out that he loved birds (he once brought in a photo album of his budgies). He also had a sister that he did a lot of activities with.

It grieves me that he has passed away & it fills me with rage given the circumstances of his passing. I’ve both emotions under control but I admit it has taken a bit out of me because he didn’t deserve to leave this life like that. When our time is up, that’s that, but really? Gunning someone down in cold blood? It bothers the hell out of me when people take the lives of others; whether in times of war or 1:1 scenarios like these I can’t shrug it off easily.

I’m going to have to wrestle this one out with God, she and I need to talk it out…strongly and honestly…with one another. I hope I get some peace from this tragedy, I hope his family gets some peace as well.

~Nathanael~

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