25/30 – I’m dreaming of a right Christmas

I’m dreaming of a right Christmas

There’s a level of disfunctionality that has been a part of pretty much every Christmas I’ve experienced with my immediate family. Everyone. The only time I had an enjoyable Christmas in recent years was when I spent time with my former fiancee’s family and extended family; so much bonhomie, so much love & plenty of peace and goodwill to all who gathered.

I liked it a great deal, it gave me a perspective of what a good Christmas looks like, and yet today’s prompt for the 30 day writing challenge is worst Christmas ever…well, here goes nothing.

Worst Christmas Ever

I think my worst Christmas came at a time in my life where I wanted what my friends had i.e. material possessions, in which it was right when Nintendo 64 was popular. I asked for it to be my Christmas present, my only Christmas present to sweeten the deal…but I wasn’t given it, and while that did make things horrible for me at the time, what made that Christmas the worst ever was that my father hadn’t purchased me anything and I think when I was shopping for a Christmas present for my mom on the 22nd or 23rd of December he said I should pick out something for my Christmas present as he hadn’t gotten me anything.

I’ve had a lot of shitty Christmases, but to select one’s own present after someone admits they haven’t gotten you anything takes the cake as being the worst Christmas ever. I kind of dread any holiday that approaches where standard decorum is getting together with friends and family, because that never happens in my family’s case, we either do things alone or alone but individually, so usually all holidays of this nature suck for me…but I have hope.

I have hope that someday I will be able to throw the best damn holiday parties ever! Whether I’m hosting or adding to the celebrations, I want it to be fun because I haven’t been given that in my life and I don’t want my June or my kids to have something that resembles what my current lot in life is. I enjoy cooking, so you know I’m going to be working my ass off to make good food for those I love and care about. I have hope that things will get better and these present times and shittier past times will be a blip on my radar and will not be repeated verbatim ad nauseum.

Here’s to better Christmases and every other holiday in the future! 🙂

~Nathanael~

24/30 – Thailand through his lens

Thailand through his lens

I have never met Chris of Christao408 dot com but for a year I’ve been seeing some of his adventures, some of the food he’s eaten and his slice of Thailand through his lens via his website.

Thailand is one of those countries I want to visit; the cultures, the food, the architecture and the people. My good friend of 18 years parents-in-law have a ministry working within the red light district and with the women who are leaving prostitution, but my liking of Thailand goes back to when I was younger and I would read National Geographic voraciously, not only the new ones that came in every month but the older ones I would buy pretty much bulk at garage sales.

Chris’ perspectives are very much a-day-in-the-life and I like that, and with it being a blog primarily about his life in Thailand I get a bit of a grasp of a culture that is unfamiliar to me, it broadens my worldview. The world is quite a large place but in the age of the internet it can seem so small and at times personable because of the words and photos of others that gives me an idea what life is like from where they’re from, and I definitely appreciate that.

Until I get to traveling to new and different places I’m going to have to enjoy the world through other people’s words and photos, and when I do I will be sure to return the favor to others.

~Nathanael~

23/30 – What’s the deal with Stiletto heels?

 

What’s the deal with Stiletto heels?

When I was younger someone explained to me that women wore Stiletto heels to add some movement to their butt which would then in turn attract guys to looking at their butts and so on and so forth.

I can’t really say I watch a woman’s butt when she wears a pair of Stiletto heels, but all the while I can’t but wonder; do women wear Stiletto heels for themselves or for others? They strike me as rather uncomfortable to wear in the first place, but to walk and perhaps at a brisk pace? If suffering for fashion can be defined, Stiletto heels is thy name, busting an ankle or worse seems like a possibility.

If I date someone who decides to wear these shoes, I might gently tell her that she doesn’t need to do that (if it’s for me that she wears them) because as interesting and “hot” as some people might perceive them, it’s not worth wearing a cast due to some fiasco caused by wearing those kind of shoes. If she wants to wear a nice pair of shoes, go with an open pair of sandals or something like that, I’m not a shoe kinda guy but I certainly don’t want someone’s external beauty to be exemplified by a pair of shoes especially at the risk of them making her look like an ass.

Wear shoes for yourselves ladies, don’t wear them for guys, because it might not be worth it especially if it is a pair of Stiletto heels.

~Nathanael~

 

22/30 – If I had one day of life left

If I had one day of life left

I would start the day by making myself breakfast; banana crepes and a medium rare steak with a side of fried mashed potatoes and caramelized onions.

I’d go for an hour long bike ride, listening to a mix of Matisyahu, Electric Light Orchestra, Led Zepplin and The Arcade Fire.

I’d go out for sushi lunch buffet at my favorite sushi place the town over from where I live, pick up my tab and the cute girl who eats sushi alone.

I’d hurry back home and grab my camera and take some cloud pictures in RAW.

I’d worry less and love more, to which I’d talk to my family and tell them I want all my earthly belongings sold and the profits made divided between the soup kitchen I help out with on Thursday mornings & my former fiancee’s sons for furthering their education when they get to that point in life.

I’d facebook status my love with a bye-for-now-but-not-forever and a 🙂 to all my facebook friends.

I’d tell my father I forgive him for all the rotten shit he did to me.

I’d call up my friend Mark and tell him to be a good husband and father to his future wife and kids, or else I’ll haunt him to his dying day.

I’d call up my former fiancee and tell her that our time as a WE were some of the best moments of my entire life, and if she would hear me out I would say she deserves a better man than the guy she married.

I’d go outside with a cold IPA and a grilled cheese sandwich (dill havarti on rye) and blow some bubbles.

I’d tell my family I love them one last time.

I’d curl up in an Adirondack chair in front of an outdoor fire with my teddy bear in my arms and watch the skies and watch the stars, I’d whisper goodbye world, hello God and that’s how I would carry out my last day on Earth if there was no tomorrow.

~Nathanael~

21/30 – Favours I’d ask of Satan

Favours I’d ask of Satan

There really aren’t any favors I’d ask of Satan since he really doesn’t possess any power, he exists and he does coerce people and tempt them to do bad things but it’s up to the individual to do the right or wrong thing due to freewill – hence excuses of “the devil made me do it” really are quite pathetic, the choice was always yours!

Asking Satan for favors isn’t going to get you far, as he has no powers, he has the capability to mess with you to have the appearance of possessing powers especially when times look bleak it might seem like God is absent and Satan has the upper hand but it really isn’t so.

I remember when 9/11 happened some people asked where was God on 9/11? He was there, but he didn’t interfere with our freewill, because it was the freewill of the terrorists who crashed the planes to carry out that heinous act against humanity. I think that’s why I think freewill sucks at times, while it does give us the freedom to do almost whatever we want…whatever we want, to which we are selfish and narrow-minded at times, we want what’s best for us and not for others, we do have moments where we think about others but it’s more of a rarity than not.

I do have faith in God, what he’s doing, and the good things people do in his name… but there are times where I just get frustrated with humanity and the way we fight against each other so much of the time. I did come across link the other day that brightened up my life a bit, 21 pictures that will restore your faith in humanity, and interestingly enough if I had been about 2 feet to the right I’d have been in the first picture! 🙂

So favours I’d ask of Satan, hmmm…walk off a short pier and don’t come back perhaps? 😉

~Nathanael~