…but I do take comfort in his words when it says
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
But Jeremiah, writing to individuals exiled into a land that wasn’t their own goes on to say this (verses 12-14);
Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you,” declares the Lord, “and will bring you back from captivity. I will gather you from all the nations and places where I have banished you,” declares the Lord, “and will bring you back to the place from which I carried you into exile.”
I do have a hope in my future years, where God is guiding me now and where I might end up, but there are times when I am plagued by doubt and being in the proverbial “thick of it” makes it hard to see. Yet I get that’s a good place to be, doubting and also taking things by faith and not necessarily belief.
Do I blame God for my self-imposed exile? I did for a while, but I recognize that sometimes life is life and shit is shit, and sometimes there’s not much to do but get up every time I’m knocked down, to thank God for the new start and every second chance, to keep walking as if I am in a dense fog in the middle of a forest…keep walking, keep taking life, my journey by faith, one day at a time…and sometimes it has to be one minute at a time.
Things aren’t working out for me at this time, and I will write about it equally inasmuch I will pray about it and for others. I’m not the only one in exile and it is encouraging when brothers and sisters share with me their journey and their struggles, it hurts to hear their story but it points to that I am not alone in my struggles, I feel deeply connected to humanity in such times.