I’m out in Los Angeles for the week

Earlier this year I met one of my online friends offline and we shared life with one another and I brought up a dream I had where took the I’m Sorry Campaign to San Francisco Pride in the Castro District.

My friend doesn’t live in San Francisco but Los Angeles, and he brought up that the I’m Sorry Campaign would be a good thing at the West Hollywood/L.A. Pride Parade and I said I’d love to do help out with that. With a lot of direction and help from The Marin Foundation and Michael Kimpan, that idea and concept talked about earlier this year is quickly becoming a reality.

***

I say all this not to toot my own horn, or self-praise myself, but rather turn any resemblance of praise and thanks and offer it up to God. Even though it has been a harrowing experience, despite my anxiety and a few rough patches in getting this together and even rough patches in my own life…I am more at peace about this now than I ever have been because of several variables:

– Someone else believing in me – It has been been encouraging to be given the task to help lead this up. As much as I gravitate to leadership roles, lately I have been plagued with doubt and worry, anxiety and frustration, and when this happens to me in my life (which is an irregular event but still happens.) I don’t function well. at. all.
Yet Michael believes in me and what I am capable of doing. There’s something to the nature of imposing (in a good sense) belief and capability on others, because while it hasn’t sustained me or inflated my ego, it has restored me in some ways and brought about be believing in my capacities.

– I am not going into this alone – If I am honest with myself and you the reader, there is a sneaky sly deceptive voice that tries to get under my skin with a message of “you’re going into this alone” and then I temporarily freeze up and then I find myself dwelling on the last part of Romans 8:31 where it says “If God is for us, who can be against us” and personalize it, if God is for me, who can be against me? It brings me back to level ground, it brings me back to a place of recognizing that while this is new territory, the way has already been paved which is what leads me to my last point…

– God is here, I’m just invited to be a part of this adventure – God is present in L.A., God will be at LA Pride, God will be amongst those in the parade who read our signs and interact with those gathered to be a part of the I’m Sorry Campaign in LA. I realized the nature of God being present at Pride parades when I was on my way to the first I’m Sorry Campaign in Chicago; I was hesitant and even worried as to how the message of I’m Sorry would be received, but a gentle breeze of the Holy Spirit rolled over me, encouraging me that I was to be a part of something bigger and better than myself, something that God was already involved in…before it even happened! That set the tone of my heart, mind, and soul for that one and ever one since, and even the one that’s going to happen this Sunday.

***

I am truly blessed to be out here and to be a part of this, to God be the glory in all that we do! 🙂

~Nathanael~

A new beginning of sorts

As of last week I was terminated from my job of over 2 years. This is where I will start and finish about my old job…

But here, is where I start again, start anew in figuring out where to go to from here.

When it comes down to it, I know what I want to do with my work life; I want to work with individuals who have different types of mental illnesses, working with them on their terms as well as any IP’s they may have. I’ve fallen in love with what my last job entailed, and certainly the individuals I worked for, I have love for them as well. Unfortunately the reality that is at hand is that Illinois, when it comes to funding Social Services (both in those who work my last job and supporting those who need that help) ranks near the bottom; 48 out of 51 for the last two years. If that wasn’t enough of an impetus there’s also the fact that Illinois is an expensive state to live in, and so my thoughts…as well as time looking for work…has brought me back to seeing what’s available in Tennessee, Memphis in particular.

I know what I am capable when it comes to work, I know a good deal of my strengths as well as my weaknesses, and I plan on using this time to be productive in finding more of the same as to what I’ve been doing work-wise over the last 2 years. I will be honest, I am excited and frightened, hopeful and scared, as I know what it takes to do a good job but the nature of building a professional relationship with anyone takes time and I have “new-guy-on-the-job” syndrome with every job I’ve taken. I guess it serves me well in being cautious and deliberate, but my ambivert nature gets perceived as being an introvert, and that’s only the tip of the iceberg.

So maybe my bro Carlos was right in this being a blessing in disguise. Maybe I was there for a season to go on and find something better for myself, time will tell but I am full of hope and ambition.

Onward and upward!
~Nathanael~

G is for Gouda, it’s good enough for me – 1/28

https://nathanaelvitkus.files.wordpress.com/2014/02/083d5-9906_10_17-gouda-cheese_web.jpg

As much as I like this cheese, preferably the smoked variety, I did some research prior to this writing challenge and found out that Gouda (the cheese) is named after Gouda (a city in The Netherlands where the cheese is made)!

The city of Gouda is over 700 years old (granted city rights in 1272 to be exact), is known for the cheese but there’s also some sweet architecture (more of an interest than cheese).

https://i2.wp.com/farm3.staticflickr.com/2049/2273088401_eb4718f224_z.jpg
…and canals

…and a coat of arms
File:Wapen van Gouda.svg

…and whirligigs

…and vitrals (stained glass on a smaller scale)
https://i2.wp.com/farm3.staticflickr.com/2438/3585091242_6d12c909a8_z.jpg

…and a windmill!

It’s a city that was built on a swamp, went through some ordeals such as bad fires, arson, destruction, occupation from invaders, and a deadly plague that wiped out nearly 20% of the population…but still, Gouda stands.

A great cheese indeed, but a great city and population that has overcome a lot of hardships…here’s to Gouda the city and cheese! 🙂

Wikipedia’s page on Gouda

~Nathanael~